Mission:The one with the Ghost hawks and big boat
TL;DR: Casual walk through the neighbourhood; .
Join CSAT special forces
they said. It'll be fun
they said. You wont have to do a hole lot
they said. Well, let me tell you; they were absolutely right! (at least for A2
(more on that later
I have broken my sweat more in a supermarket. My brain has been harder taxed watching a children's tv show. My ass has...you get the idea. This was mission was a breeze and I put all the credit to its success to our glorious leaders and sparsity of enemy contact
The mission began with the usual low brow, shit banter we have all come to take for granted. Something about "kill, kill, kill" "no, you can't use your bazooka yet" "Stop or i'll shoot
" that sort of thing.
We advanced onto the objective harbour town using the tried and tested tactical blob for the most part before arranging ourselves into a more useful, split, tactical blob. Pooter was my FTL and would occasionally say things. They have been orders...they have been comments about the weather; I'm honestly not sure which.note: Execute Pooter. Send Harry to the potato fields for hard labour.
Gradually we progressed onto the harbour, where we came accross our first Ghost hawk. It was manned, as in, there was someone firing a 2000rd/min minigun at us. This may have been an issue if it wasn't for Zitron's infantry combat doctrine #034: How to engage and destroy any MG emplacement
. Its a Hardback, single page manual with about 2 lines of text and a badly drawn diagram. It states that in order to defeat a MG position, you "Attack straight on. Peaking is advised but not necessary". Fortunately for A2, Zitron (the author of said doctrine) was on hand to give a live demonstration. He killed the helicopter gunner and we were able to advance.
Once clear, A2 took the initiative note: initiative is considered mutiny, round up A2 for summary execution
and proceeded onto the next Ghost hawk. Boarding it, we set off towards the NATO Aircraft carrier like a titanium, flying trogan horse. (at this point, GeEom died). Netkev and Pooter engaged the Deck crew enemy with their Miniguns "Brrrrp, BRRRRRRRRRRRP, BrrrrRRRRrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRp, Brrrrp, BRRRRRRP, Brrrrp, BRRRRRRRRRRRP, BrrrrRRRRrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRp, Brrrrp, BRRRRRRP, Brrrrp, BRRRRRRRRRRRP, BrrrrRRRRrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRp, Brrrrp, BRRRRRRP, Brrrrp, BRRRRRRRRRRRP, BrrrrRRRRrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRp, Brrrrp, BRRRRRRP.........Brrrrp." note: Excellent attention to detail. Execute Harry on suspicion of working for the enemy
We arrived on the Deck, finished off the rest of the crew, did some..wait, who are you? why have you got that gun. no! please! I am no spy! AHHHH you shot me! nooooo please i have Goat, who will look after the goat?! Ahhh, noo! you shot me. Kheeee keehhhhh! bleeehh, bleeeeeeee..........bleh.